We have both a negative face and a positive face. (Note that “negative” doesn’t mean “bad” here, it’s simply the opposite of “positive.”) Negative face is the need to be independent and free from imposition. Positive face is the need to be connected, to belong, to be a member of the group. So, a face-saving act that emphasizes a person’s negative face will show concern about imposition (I’m sorry to bother you…; I know you’re busy, but…). A face-saving act that emphasizes a person’s positive face will show solidarity and draw attention to a common goal (Let’s do this together…; You and I have the same problem, so…).

Ideas about the appropriate language to mark politeness differ substantially from one culture to the next. If you have grown up in a culture that has directness as a valued way of showing solidarity, and you use direct speech acts (Give me that chair!) to Pragmatics 135 people whose culture is more oriented to indirectness and avoiding direct imposition, then you will be considered impolite. You, in turn, may think of the others as vague and unsure of whether they really want something or are just asking about it (Are you using this chair?). In either case, it is the pragmatics that is misunderstood and, unfortunately, more will be communicated than is said.

Understanding how successful communication works is actually a process of interpreting not just what speakers say, but what they “intend to mean.”